I’ve said many times before that one of the blue zones’ critical health lessons—arguably their first and most important lesson—is the importance of environment.
So if a genie told me I could choose ONE word and have everyone automatically understand it the same way I do, environment would probably be my magic pick.
I can understand if the word “environment” seems a little bit spongy. We all know what the word means, but it’s hard to say precisely what it means. We know it refers to physical space and surroundings, but it’s also an abstraction which might be concerned with any aspect of that space (material or immaterial).
To be honest, this degree of sponginess is intentional, and it’s a good thing here. The broad theme of environment might have a hundred different “layers” to it—everything from air quality to architecture to zoning—but they all share a simple unifying principle:
Your environment always has a significant effect on your health, for better or for worse. In fact, your environment almost always plays a bigger role in your health than the choices you make within that environment.
That second part is very important, but it’s not always intuitive to us. We’re used to thinking that everything in life is a function of our conscious choices. And yes, of course our choices matter, but there’s a bigger picture around those choices, and that bigger picture makes a bigger difference than the choices themselves.
Even though this kind of thinking isn’t intuitive to us, the same principle holds true for our social environment (as spongy as that term may be). We think the state of our social life is explained mostly by conscious choices when the bigger, better explanations boil down to “where we are” and “who’s around.”
And isn’t that… kind of a relief? Maintaining a social life can seem really difficult and complicated if you think about it from the wrong angle, or too much. But we’re all social animals by nature—yes, even the introverts!—and that dimension of life really can become effortlessly healthy and happy under the right conditions. You just have to put yourself in the right places (somewhat literally) and try not to overthink things.
On that note, let’s jump into today’s main article…
Loneliness is the silent epidemic of our times, and it’s barely an exaggeration to say that the average Westerner’s lack of active friendships is killing them. If nothing else, it’s shriveling their quality and quantity (expectancy) of life by an alarming margin.
(I already cracked open this topic in Edition 14, so you’re also welcome to read more there.)
Fortunately, this is a pretty solvable problem in the grand scheme of human health. Not only that, but it’s also relatively easy to solve AND it’s immensely rewarding when you do. 😃
Unfortunately, as I mentioned in the introduction, a lot of us are a little stuck in our thinking. You already knew that loneliness is a solvable problem, but the question of what exactly to do about it (read: what to choose) can be vexing when there’s no bigger picture in frame.
So today, I want to offer six pieces of blue zone-sourced, environment-focused advice on how to rejuvenate your social life without overthinking it. Remember, even just ONE more friend in your life can do you a whole lot of good, and you’ll really feel the difference!
1️⃣ You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. I could have used several clichés here, so feel free to substitute your favorite, but Gretzky’s and all the others strike at an essential and unavoidable truth: the only way to succeed at anything is to try. Might as well say that first.
2️⃣ Stop asking yourself what you should do to socialize and start asking yourself where you could go. I already unpacked this big idea in the introduction, but to paraphrase: loneliness really is more of an “environment” problem than most people realize, and this can be a useful thought.
In their loneliness, a lot of wonderful people think they’re doing something wrong when, more likely, they’re not spending enough time in the right places. So ask yourself: where might I stand the best chances of meeting people I really like? (And where can I find the people I already like and want to spend more time with?)
3️⃣ Make a habit of getting out of the house, or at least getting ready to get out of the house. First and somewhat obviously, you sometimes run into people when you’re out of the house, and this can be a very good thing if you allow yourself to think that way (see next piece of advice).
But there are other, subtler ways that this habit is good for our social brains. Research has consistently found, for example, that a person’s self-image and self-esteem improve once they’ve put themselves together enough to go out in public—even if it’s just street clothes and no extra polish.
Something about knowing we’re “ready” to face people makes us feel more confident, and a lot of people are missing out on that little daily “boost” nowadays. You know, because going out in public is increasingly optional. 😆
4️⃣ When life drops an opportunity in your lap, pick it up. It might not happen soon or often, but there will come a time (maybe tomorrow, maybe six months from now) when an enticing social opportunity presents itself to you, invitation and all, and you’ll know you should probably take it.
I don’t usually say things like this, but… the universe is dropping a hint. Pick it up!
In my seasoned experience, a lot of beautiful things can start this way—and for your part, all you have to do is say “yes.” If nothing else, people who say “yes” usually get a story out of it.
5️⃣ Eat meals with other people as often as possible. I’ve written separately about the health benefits of eating meals with others, particularly our families. For now, I’ll just say that I think this is good advice for two reasons:
🅰️ Everyone has to eat, and food brings people together. I’m not saying that every meal has to be an exercise in extraversion. I’m just saying that there are LOTS of opportunities to get people around the same table, and this is great for us because it means we can consistently satisfy multiple needs all at once.
Also, one of the beautiful quirks of human psychology is that eating around other people actually makes us feel calmer and more relaxed together, like we don’t have to be on the defensive with one another (because it activates the parasympathetic nervous system).
🅱️ There are a million and one ways to share a meal with other people. But there’s no wrong way to eat together. We might eat the wrong things sometimes, but all else being equal, eating together really is always better for us.
6️⃣ Volunteer your time. I already made my slightly irreverent case for volunteering in Edition 33, so I’ll just add a timely update here.
With so many recent and forthcoming natural disasters on our minds, a lot of people really do wish they could help but simply don’t know how.
Raise your hand if you’ve ever…
- Entertained the fantasy of rolling into a disaster zone with a full 18-wheeler of essential supplies to give away, then immediately…
- Realized you’re nowhere near qualified, connected, or wealthy enough to do that
- Momentarily considered donating to XYZ’s relief efforts, but felt thoroughly underwhelmed by the thought of giving money to an 800 number
- Briefly wondered what else you could do to help, then watched that thought vanish as the rest of your life resumed
A lot of you 🫵 have your hands up right now. I can’t see it, but I know it.
Pretty much any device that can read this email can also Google things. So if you really do want to help somehow, ask Google what you can do or (better yet) where you can go to help in your area. And once you know where to go, all you have to do is say yes and show up!
It doesn’t hurt that volunteering is a great way to make friends—often the best kind of friends, too, with life interests and a charitable spirit in common.
Still, as a parting thought, I think it’s worth re-iterating a blunt but well-meaning thought from Edition 33: you’re making the world a better place no matter how you choose to volunteer, and that means you don’t have to volunteer for disaster relief if that’s not the right “place” for you. Sometimes, times like these just awaken you to charitable impulses, and it’s up to you to direct them wherever they need to be. 😇
If you want to understand what’s wrong with the health-improvement industry nowadays, you need only examine this well-circulated quotation from Alexis Carrel:
“Man cannot remake himself without suffering, for he is both the marble and the sculptor.”
It’s an evocative mental image, and beautifully written… but it’s not a very good argument. In fact, it’s simply not true.
Human beings can remake themselves (as we all know), and a lot of them do suffer in the process (as we’ve all seen). But that doesn’t mean suffering is actually necessary for most people to be healthier!
If I ran a Crossfit studio, I would have Carrel’s quotation printed up on the wall—and my cynical reason is, essentially, that it would lend credibility to my selfish motives. If you want to convince people to buy and swallow a bitter pill, start by convincing them that ALL pills are bitter (even though they’re not).
Now here’s a different quotation (from Camus) which provides a much better, much happier way to think about the pursuit of health:
“In the middle of winter, I at last discovered that there was in me an invincible summer.”
People don’t need to change who they are to be healthier. They just need to rediscover how to enjoy being themselves in healthy ways.
That’s the spirit in which I created the 7-Day Longevity Reset.
This is not some boot camp that promises hell and tells you to like it. Quite the opposite: it’s a lightweight, on-demand virtual program designed to teach you the seven fundamental lessons of the blue zones’ effortless health. The idea is to help you shift your lifestyle in healthier directions (so you feel better), but in such a way that the adjustments are your idea.
Also unlike most other health-adjustment programs, the Reset is a steal: it’s just $11 for lifetime access to all seven lessons and the supplemental materials!
So if you feel like you’re stuck in the middle of a proverbial winter, health-wise, and you want to start feeling warm about yourself again, the Reset is for you.
Gazpacho
Ingredients
2 1⁄2 pounds red globe, beefsteak, or heirloom tomatoes, peeled and diced (about 5 cups)
1 large green bell pepper, stemmed, cored, and diced (about 1 cup)
1 large yellow bell pepper, stemmed, cored, and diced (about 1 cup)
6 medium scallions, trimmed and thinly sliced (about 1 cup)
1⁄2 cup plain tomato juice, or more as necessary
1⁄4 cup fresh lime juice or red wine vinegar
1 tablespoon tomato paste
1 teaspoon minced garlic
1⁄2 teaspoon salt
1⁄4 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper
1⁄4 teaspoon ground dried cayenne or bottled hot red pepper sauce
Finely chopped fresh cilantro leaves, for garnish
Finely chopped fresh Italian flat-leaf parsley leaves, for garnish
Lime wedges, for garnish
The Method
- Place the tomatoes, bell peppers, scallions, 1⁄2 cup tomato juice, lime juice or vinegar, tomato paste, garlic, salt, pepper, and cayenne or hot red pepper sauce in a large bowl.
- Stir until the tomato paste dissolves and everything is well blended.
- Ladle half the mixture into a food processor fitted with the chopping blade or a large blender.
- Cover and process or blend until fairly smooth, less than 1 minute.
- Pour back into the bowl and stir well.
- Cover and refrigerate for at least 2 hours or up to 2 days.
- Stir in additional tomato juice if the soup becomes too thick.
- Ladle into bowls and garnish each with cilantro, parsley, and lime wedges.